The Guy I’m Having Sex With Won’t Stop Quoting Diary of a Wimpy Kid (and Other Love Problems)


Unsolicited is a love and relationship advice column where the love experts here at CollegeHumor offer up their sagely words of wisdom to individuals on the internet who in no way asked for our help. If you’ve seen anyone online dealing with relationship issues and you want us to give them advice, send an email to with the subject “LOVE ADVICE.”

Our first lovelorn individual comes from the treasure trove of r/relationships – and tells of a very normal relationship issue that everyone has dealt with at one point or another:

I have a kinda weird problem. I’ve been seeing this new guy for about 1 month. Things are going well except for this one weird thing……he is constantly saying the phrase “ZOO WEE MAMA”. ALL. THE. TIME.

He says it when he’s excited about something. He says it when his food tastes good. He says it AFTER HE ORGASMS WHEN WE HAVE SEX.

Now usually I am a pretty laid back girl however this has become really annoying and somewhat embarrassing in front of my friends. I also don’t understand what it means or why he says it? I asked him about it when we were cuddling at one point and he sat straight up and started speaking into his watch (not a smartwatch btw) and said “Gadzooks! They’re after my secrets!” and hopped out of bed and ran into the kitchen to eat snacks. I wish I was kidding…

He’s usually somewhat normal but this is driving me insane. I’ve asked him to stop and he usually responds with “zoo wee mama! I’ve been asked to stop saying my favorite phrase!” and then laughs…. I swear if he says it one more time I don’t think I’ll be able to handle it. It isn’t funny. He made me so mad the other day when he said it after sex again that I had to get up and leave his apartment.

Other than that, things are going well. Is it worth it to keep this going? Should I drop him? Am I overreacting?

tl;dr: Guy I’m seeing won’t stop saying “zoo wee mama” all the time.


First of all, “Zoo-Wee-Mama” comes from the book and film series, Diary of a Wimpy Kid – specifically, a simple newspaper comic that’s a key plot point in a few of the books. In the comic, “zoo-wee-mama” is an exclamation catchphrase meant to communicate surprise:


Now, what you should actually DO about this issue is up to you – if you’re someone who is extremely impressed by stealth references to Diary of a Wimpy Kid being hammered into the ground repeatedly at every opportunity without ever providing context, then it would probably be worthwhile to keep your relationship going.

If you’re NOT into that, then you should tell him to “get lost and stop screeching a catchphrase from a literal children’s book during sex, what the hell?” (stealth reference to Diary of a Wimpy Kid: The Last Straw – the third novel in the …read more

Source: Very Funny

You may also like...

Leave a Reply